Tonight Mark asked me, "How did our girls get to be so sweet"...a legitimate question. They just are. I got the girls to Mass this morning for Ash Wednesday, and tonight I had to think, "When is the last time I made it to Mass on Ash Wednesday?". Let's see...not in Portland...working fulll-time with a toddler in daycare and husband in the hospital (working).....not our first year here. Not our second year here, with a newborn and it being cold and flu season (come on people, I'm an NP.) Not last year (a 4, 2 and 9 month old). So, let's see. That means that for 8 years I have missed this Holy Day of obligation. Thankfully, my wise father has me convinced that there is no such thing as purgatory, or hell...so I should still be OK. So we get to Mass and get our ashes (Maggie and Ella, too). There is something striking hearing the priest say to your children, "Remember that you are dust and to dust you shall return." Ella said very loudly when we got back to the pew, "Mom, we can wash this off before bed, right?". During Mass Maggie yelled , "Yea Man" 3 times. Maggie also started yelling at the little girl next to us (a friend, no less). But, we persevered, I did not have to leave the pew ONCE. I think Mark and I have both given up all desserts. Anything after dinner is a no-no. If Christ can die on the cross, that the least I can do is put down the Skinny Cow, right? It is going to be a good Lent. Our parish is offering so many things (rosary making, Stations, a parish mission). Many opportunities to really focus on the darkness, the emptimess, and the anticipation that this time in the church brings. I can hear Mark making his way to bed upstairs and this basement is cold. Time to hit the hay. It was a good day. Blessings.

I brought Ella and Maggie to the grocery store today, pretty entertaining. I let Maggie just run in front of me, and we are lucky that she avoided collisions with multiple carts. I didn't care, that kid has been cooped up all winter. We got a kick out of the big salmon head in the seafood dept. Ella yedded , "Mom, loook at all of the SEA CREATURES!"

What a weekend!

Guitar Lessons

Skating with Grandma

After school snack

Papa reading to the kinders at Nativity

Swimming lessons at the YWCA

...a very fun weekend....full of LOVE! We had so much fun with my mom and dad. We danced in the living room, watched Madagascar II, had a pizza party, went to ice skating lessons and swimming lessons, went to Mass, ate pancakes twice, went out for a grown-up dinner, dad got in a guitar lesson for Reece (and me!), mom & Reece and I went ice skating. Did I mention that mom and I got out for lunch together, too? It still felt like we had quite a bit of downtime. I am so happy we get to see them in 3 weeks at Georgia Ann's Baptism! We have so muc fun together...love you mom and dad.

Ella....

Tonight Ella called down to me from her crib that she had to go "poo-poo". After she went I was carrying her upstairs and she said "Mama, you be Fraline Maria, and I'll be Leisel and pretend like Fraline Maria was really proud of Leisel for pooping on the potty." I didn't even HAVE to pretend. I WAS proud of Leisel pooping on the potty.

Fun

I have to figure my new picture uploader out. I uploaded these blindly not knowing what pictures were going on. Not bad. I don't hear you complaining.

Ella had fun fun fun at her birthday party. Special day for us. It was Valentine's Day and everyone was already on sugar overload then we added cake and ice cream.

Best moment of my day today was ice skating with Reece today and she spontaneously said "I love you" about 20 times. It was just so sweet skating around and around holding her hand, groovin' to Journey and other 80's rock music that was being played. I even heard "Chaka Khan." That's right people. It wasn't L.L .Cool J but it will do.

Hey sisters, Last night at the club we went to for dinner, the lounge singer, who looked like a cross between Little Richard and Louis Armstrong was singing "Goody, Goody!!!!!!" I totally was singing along and miming the routine that mom taught us for the cardiac rehab picnic circa 1984. If I had had one more glass of wine I probably would have asked him to sing it again, just so I could perform.

Tubes and Treats

Ella turned 3 on Monday, February 9th. What a big day for a big girl! Mark popped in the video of the day she was born, and it all came rushing back. I loved having my mom in town for that delivery. There is just something about seeing your mom right after having a baby that is so.....complete. Ella was such a beautiful newborn. Little rosebud lips and all. She is such source of love and laughter in our family.
Maggie had her ear tubes placed this week. Poor kid has had so many ear infections. Wednesday morning we needed to be at the surgery center at 6:45 a.m. It was going to be a hectic morning already, complicated by the fact that Ella woke up at 4:00 calling me up to snuggle saying she "felt hungry" (warning: Ella said this before the last time she threw up) and then threw up (see "warning"). At one point during the morning I just remember holding a trash can for Ella to puke in and holding Maggie on my hip trying to dress her for her trip to the OR while Mark was in the shower. Always a little jolting as a prent seeing your child go through anesthesia, but I tried to put it in perspective the this wasn't cardiac surgery. She did great. So did I (FYI).
One night at the end of a very long day Ella this week told me I looked pretty. I think it was because I was wearing chino's and a brown shirt instead of the usual terry jogging suit or Creighton T-shirt. SO I picked her up and held her and said "Oh Ella , that is so nice,....I like to hear that". She looked at me and said "You have a very, very, very, very pretty nose." The irony is that I have never liked my nose, which made me just laugh. I think it goes back to 6th grade. A boy broke up with me through a friend of his telling me at the swimming pool (doesn't this sounds like a 6th grade break-up?)and his friend just said "Ryan wants to break up with you because he thinks your nose is too big". My grandma also once told me that she really liked my hair-cut...."it made my nose look smaller.". Put that on the list of things not to say to a pre-pubescent girl!
Reece is excited for Valentine's Day. She made a mailbox for the cards that she gets and wrote out all of her Valentine's. She has started reading the last 3 weeks, and has just taken off...amazing. I guess we are getting to the point where Mark and I will have to stop spelling out
words like, " I-C-E-C-R-E-A-M, C-H-I-N-E-S-E-F-O-O-D--T-A-K-E-O-U-T-T-R-I-P-W-I-T-H-O-U-T-K-I-D-S-" , and other words.
I love Valentine's Day..... even during those years in my 20's when I didn't have a significant other I loved it. I knew He was out there. I always have had so much love in my life from my mom and dad, sisters, friends. I tried to focus on Valentime's Day on all of the love that I had in my life and the romantic love that I would have someday. If I wallowed in self-pity on Valentine's Day then, that I would regret wasting away that day later in life when I was with my One True Valentine. Yes it sucked working at Deglman Dormatory front desk for 2 years on Valentine's Day and seeing the flower and candy literally POUR in the door of this all-girls dorm and listening to the squeals of delighted freshman waifs come to claim their treasures. But I got over it. Really.
I love my Valentine, Mark. He is my every dream come true and then some. XOX

Potty pics

At this rate Maggie will pass up Ella in the potty training department.

Sleep...who needs it...wait....I do.

The night Reece was born she slept in my arms in the hospital. My C-section was at 7pm and I didn't get to my room until 10...I just couldn't imagine laying this exquisite creature in a bassinet. Not even for 5 minutes. Time went by and eventually Mark fell asleep. I didn't. One o'clock, 3 o'clock, 5 o'clock. At 5 I realized someone may be up at my parents in Lincoln, Nebraska. I called. No one answered, and I left a very mean spirited message that my mother saved for 4 years that I would listen to now and then. Something about "my baby being so beautiful that I Ineeded to tell someone how beautiful she was and there was no one to talk to in Portland, Oregon at 5 o'clock a.m. and someone should PICK UP THE PHONE!!!". She slept in my arms every night in the hospital.

We got home. She slept in my arms the first night we were home. Come on...it was only her first night. (But you see, it was only my first night.) "What if I put her down, and when I go to get her the next time, something terrible has happened? What if I lose my baby girl, and I never see again?" She stayed in my arms. 16 weeks pass.

Time to head back to work from maternity leave. Yes, I would have slept better if she was in her crib, but I am going to be away from her ALL DAY. I need to sleep with her. I WANT to be able to nurse her ALL NIGHT LONG. I deserve to be next to my baby all night if I have to say good-bye to her tomorrow and only get to see her once during the day when I go and nurse her, and then leave her again to go back to work, crying.

I worked until she was 3. Sometimes full time, sometimes part-time. I missed her during the day. I needed her. It has always been more about me and Mark wanting her to be close to us, than her needing to be close to Mark and I. Mark was over night every 4th night, or more and away from us for days at a time. He wanted to be close to her. They say that marriage must have it's own time and space. What about when you get pregnant 3 months after you are married? We had a full 3 months of time and space. Reece, Ella and Maggie are part of us...they have been since the beginning.We wouldn't have had it any other way.

Reece is 5 1/2. Sometime she is in her own bed until 1 a.m. Sometimes she is in her bed until 5 a.m. Lately she has been in her bed unilt 11:30 p.m. We "lay the law down" every 6 months or so, then she gets on a good cycle for a couple months, some routine changes and she is back with us. To be honest, we are usually just to tired to get out of bed to take her upstairs. Lazy? Yes.

Last night we had a long talk about how she needs to REALLY try and stay in her bed. Think of something happy, pray to her gaurdian angel, Whatever. Well she did it. Six a.m. came and she ran into our bed and we slathered her with praise. She was covering her face and I asked, "what are you doing?" , "I am crying because I am happy", she replied. Too cute.

Now that I am at home with the girls and no longer in the "working world" outside of the home , I no longer feel this need to sleep with my kids every night. But I understand those who do choose to do this, if only for a few months. I thought co-sleeping was for granola eating, tree hugging, bra-burning moms ( I like granola, I have never given money to save the rainforests, and I cannot live with out a bra). I never imagined how much I would love it with my firstborn, and how hard it would be to give up. Not only for her, but for myself as well.